Seek First to Understand then to be Understood

A couple of weeks after returning from the long walk across Spain I bumped into an old friend who I hadn’t seen for a while. After a brief chat about things in general the topic of conversation came around to travelling and my most recent adventure. I like to go off wandering whenever I can and love being outdoors. This particular trip was a special one as it was to walk the Camino de Santiago.

He said “I just don’t get it, why do you want to travel so much and to different places?”

My answer was that I wanted to explore, find out more and experience more of the world in which we live.

“Yeah but you can do that using the TV, by watching travel programmes and documentaries and that sort of thing.”

I told him that wasn’t the same. Didn’t even come close.

“Yes it is, of course it is” he said, “how can it be that different? Not only do you get to see more of whatever or wherever it is, and get closer to things, you don’t have to spend all that time and money getting there. And you can do it from the comfort of the sofa.”

Hmm.

I asked “is there a drink you particularly enjoy drinking?”

“You bet, craft beer!”

“So what is it about craft beer that makes it particularly enjoyable to drink?”

“Probably because there’s such an enormous variety of brands, brews and flavours.”

“And can you tell how each one of them will taste by reading the label or looking at a description on a bottle or a board on the wall in whatever bar you’re in?”

“Well no, of course not, but why are we talking about beer?”

“I’m attempting to answer your question about me and travelling.”

“What are you on about?”

Knowing that he and his partner liked to eat out regularly I thought I’d try to get my point across in another way and so asked whether they always went to the same place to eat.

“Sometimes we do and sometimes we don’t.”

“If you go somewhere different, why do you do that?”

“Because we like to try new places and new foods, and also sometimes because we know what we’re getting at some of the places we regularly go to. Don’t get me wrong, what we’ve had might have been really nice but you know how it is when you fancy something different.”

“I really do” I replied, with a smile, totally convinced I was now getting somewhere.

“And no matter where you choose to go to eat, does the description of whatever meal you fancy on the menu tell you what the meal will taste like?”

“No.” He answered. “Of course not!”

“There you go then” I said, my smile broadening. (I’d nailed it!)

“There you go then what?” He shot back.

“You’re telling me that you don’t know what something you’re going to eat or drink will actually be like by reading about it on a menu! You have to experience it.”

I paused, searching his face for the faint flickering of a lightbulb moment…

Nothing. So I threw him another clue.

“I like to travel for the same reasons you like to go out and drink craft beer and eat nice food.”

A slight shift in his expression. I think he’s made the connection.

“But what has what I eat and drink got to do with you travelling?” He said.

I walked away…

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